I just wrapped up what was probably my last week in Aregua. I've been here for a total of 18 weeks and I've spent the last 12 of those with Elder Smith, which means that we can be pretty sure that one of us is leaving. I've grown to love this area and the people here, and I've seen them change their lives. for those reasons, I don't feel ready to leave yet, but I know that wherever I get sent this next change is where the Lord wants to put me!
If I have changes, part of the reason that I'll have such a hard time leaving Aregua is that this last week was a really difficult one; a lot of our investigators and converts have some problems that I want to help resove before I leave.
For starters, J's baptism fell through for this week because the relatives he was planning to move in with actually don't have room for him. He still wants to be baptized, but it will be a longer process than we expected, and it's very possible that he'll decide to wait for his divorce to go through before his baptism.
As Elder Smith and I travelled around teaching and trying to find a place for J to live, we crossed paths with his sister. We talked to her about the situation and she said that right now she can't offer help because she's dealing with her own family issues. Her ex-husband, who left her years ago when she was raising her children, got really sick and came back asking for help. She considered it her christian responsibiblity to help him out and now that she's taking care of him, her children (including the mother of one of our recent converts, A) are mad at her for letting him back into their lives. Bottom line: She doesn't have room for J, and she has to fend off her children because she's trying to do the right thing.
The situation that hit me hardest, though, was what is happening with familia R, the family that got married and baptized about 3 months ago. This family literally has nothing. They live in a small, one room shack behind a member's house. In total, they have five children. The youngest is a little more than a month old. Their situation is pretty difficult. The big problem is that on top of all that, the father, has fallen into an addiction to alcohol and he uses the little money he makes from working to buy more alcohol instead of food for his family. They often don't have enough money to buy food, but his wife literally can't do anything about it. She has no family, she has to take care of five children (including her new-born son), and she's still weak from her pregnancy. She has nowhere else to go... I taught this family. I helped them get married. I don't want to leave Aregua before they get their lives back in order.
With all these difficult things going on, I've felt kind of heavy and sad this week. I know that the things we teach as missionaries bless and change lives, but I'm probably not even going to be here to help and teach these families that need help. With all that on my mind, Elder Smith and I went to eat with CR, the first counselor of the bishopric here in Aregua. After eating, thinking about all the trials I've heard about recently, I felt like I should share Alma 62:41 "But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened because of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility." I did so, and bore testimony that, though we all have trials in our lives, we have the ability to choose whether we want to grow or be hardened by them. It was a cool experience because, after I shared this, C's wife told us that her family is actually having a lot of problems right now and that she needed to hear that message. After that, is was my turn to be taught. C, who served his mission in Argentina, told us that he knows that us missionaries see lots of problems. He went on to explain that while our job is to help the people here by teaching the gospel, it's important to remember that we don't have to bear the weight of all the problems we see on our own -- we can refer people to the bishop and other church members who are better equipped to handle those problems. As missionaries, we're supposed to love the people, but there is a difference between being concerned for the people you love, and being weighed down by their challenges that you can't and aren't supposed to fix. If I'm called to leave Aregua, I'll be sad knowing that the people I've taught are struggling, but I know I've done my part in teaching them. If they apply the gospel to their lives, they will find peace and happiness like Elder Smith and I promised them.
Another cool thing that happened this week was that we had divisions with our zone leaders. I was with Elder Flores, Elder Smith's trainer. We almost didn't have the divisions becasue Elder Smith didn't want to have them, and when Elder Smith doesn't want to do someting, he comes up with really clever ways to avoid it. This time, he found out how to lock Elder Flores' number on the phone so that I wouldn't be able to answer to plan the divisions. Luckily, Elder Flores knew Elder Smith would pull a trick like that, so at 9:30 on Thursday, he and his comp travelled directly to our house to surprise us and start the divisions. I had a great time with Elder Flores. It was cool to work with him and hear about his life. He's a Bolivian from Santa Cruz (are there any Moses Lake missionaries down in that part of Bolivia?) During the divisions, we passed by the familia F, the family that was so perfect last week. They were as friendly as ever, but as soon as we started teaching them about the Restoration of the gospel, they started disagreeing with what we were teaching: "We already have all the words of all the prophets. Why would we need more revelation?"; "Jesus Christ wasn't a prophet, he was literally the Spirit of God embodied,"; "But every church has its own authority. How do you know that the apostles didn't pass it on to other people to keep the church going?" We spent an hour and a half pulling out scriptures to answer their questions -- by sharing the story of Christ's baptism in Matthew, we convinced them that God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost really are separate beings -- but in that time, we only got through about half the lesson. In the end, we had to cut the lesson short, as we had another commitment. They are still a great family that understands so much, and that might get eventually get baptized. But from now on, we need to make sure to prepare really well for our lessons with them!
Reading the scriptures recently, and thinking about difficult decisions, I was touched deeply by a story in the Book of Mormon that I already love: The story of the Stripling Warriors. As I studied, I came across a few reasons why it might have been kind of frightening to turn back and fight the Lamanites in their first battle.
1.) Alma 56:12 "The Lamanites had also retained many prisoners, all of whom are chief captains, for none other have they spared alive." The stripling warriors knew that if they were captured by the Lamanites, they would all be killed, as none of them were chief captains.
2.) Alma 56:39 "And it came to pass that we did flee before them, northward. And thus we did lead away the most powerful army of the Lamanites." The small army of 2,000 young men had the largest army of Lamanites following them. That would be a pretty good reason not to fight.
3.) Alma 56:43 "Behold, we know not but they have halted for the purpose that we should come against them, that they might catch us in their snare." The stripling warriors knew it was possible that the Lamanite army wasn't following them anymore in order to trick them into turning around.
Even with all those odds against them, knowing that if they went to fight, they would probably die, they said, "Father, behold our God is with us, and he will not suffer that we should fall; then let us go forth; we would not slay our brethren if they would let us alone; therefore let us go, lest they should overpower the army of Antipus."
Here in the mission, I don't have to worry about sacrificing my life. I have to worry about giving my all to the work: all my might, mind, heart and strength. If I do that, I know that my God will be with me, and that He won't let me fail.
The church is true! No matter what problems or trials we have in our lives, if we set aside our fears and do what we know is right regardless of the consequences, He will bless us and He "will not suffer that we should fall."
I love you all! Thanks for the love and support.
Elder Fairbanks
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| Elders Smith & Fairbanks (7/10/16) |
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